A Writer's Nightmare

OMG Writers!
I had quite the nightmare that I'm sure most of you would cower in fear from!
So, it was a simple dream. It went fairly well and like most of my dreams lately, it seemed to be fairly coherent as to what was going on. Basically, my netbook, my flash drive of my current projects and a bag of my carry-on belongings were stolen! Not to mention, one of my roommates was furiously not allowing me into the house. So, I used my other roommate to distract him while I slipped inside and scrounged around for my belongings. I found Harry Potter: Deathly Hollows part 2 on DVD and quickly pocketed it. They had not pawned it from my bag yet. I could not find my netbook or flash drive anywhere. And as an author, that is one of the scariest feelings. My entire world is contained in that netbook. My life is living in that flash drive. You can't recreate your work because once you've lost it, it is hard to find the same words. Sure, it might make it better by restarting it, but it also, you lose that initial excitement of getting your first ideas out. I was heartbroken.
And then I realized that the two guys who stole my bag were now living in the other two rooms at our place. My roommate was a traitor! He had sided with them!
My sister could not distract the roommate long enough and he found me. He apologized for being so mean and not letting me into the house. I could feel myself starting to wake up. And at that moment, I saw the bag sitting off on the bookcase! My netbook, flash drive and Scream 4 were all there!
I woke up with relief...but a slight annoyance that I let my nightmare end so easily.
I pray I never lose my files again. I've only lost one story...and it is weak for it.
But I woke up and realized I back my shit up consistently. I have, like, a flash drive at work, a flash drive in my purse, my netbook is up to date and two external hard drives that have backups. Not to mention, the other flash drives and computers I own. I really hope I get the flash drive bracelet for Christmas.

Happy Writing, Writers.
And backup your files.

Starting Over After 100 Pages

I hit my deadline. 50k words in less than a month. I kept plugging along until I hit it.
And now, at 110+ words, I'm done.
I'm rewriting it all over again.

This novel I wrote in November is a shell of what I had hoped to write. It is more rushed and definitely not as dark as I had originally hoped. It was not the psychologically eating of my soul as I had anticipated. I did not mourn the situations or feel the hopeful but rabid butterflies in the pit of my stomach. Sure, it started out that way. The ideas always start out that way. But it was not the rough world that I had hoped to convey. And I was too nice. The vulgarity was limited because of my expected audience. The big "Fuck You" messages were watered down. And deep down, my characters were weak. They did not have the drive. They were too wishy-washy to commit. I love my characters. But it all somehow came unraveled.
This was not the novel I had committed to writing.

So, I start from scratch. I grab a handful of my characters, put them in fresh new clothes and give them life again. My focus needs to be more pin-pointed on them and not the outside world around me. They need to experience life, not merely live day-to-day. So, I'm starting it with a different spin. I'm snapping down more of my real life, casting out the maps and charts, plans and blogs. These characters are not me. But I have the experience. These situations are not mine. But what I have experienced can only heighten the reality of them. Enough ground work and symbolism. Enough trying to make everyone happy. This story is destined for greatness...I just lost that in the process of its previous incarnation. It's not Misfits but it revolves around similar situations. It will be dark. I will not hold back. You should never mess with an author.

Writing Because of a Restroom

It's funny how a lot of my inspiration comes to me when I'm walking into the women's bathroom at work. I am so not sure why that is the case, but it seems to be a time when my mind disconnects from work and just drifts. My heels click onto the tiled floor and I let the dim fluorescent lighting wash over me. My script a few months ago started out with a bathroom scene. "A familiar sound of urination" was a key phrase in the description. A phrase that gets quite a bit of attention. But it is so routine. And for my novel, I seem to pull a lot of my main MC's thoughts from my own when I walk into the bathroom. And no, my characters' lives do not revolve around the bathrooms. I rarely put them in the bathrooms--but it does happen more in this novel then in some. Only because bathrooms have recently pulled a lot of random thoughts. For instance, I walked into the bathroom one day to find that it was a group meeting room. Sure, women congregate in the bathroom in clusters to talk boys,  makeup and everything from tampons to lighting fixtures. I always find it intriguing when some of my friends talk on the phone while using the bathroom vs. the friends who are appalled to even have the phone near the bathroom. The head of our HR department at work frequently takes calls while she's in the stall--this I know only because she is a loud talker even a few stalls down. But the one thing that triggered it was when I made my MC have a similar viewpoint as me. She felt uncomfortable with the thought that so many women were gathered in the bathroom to talk at the counters while a few sat on the cushioned chairs and one even sat with her chair pulled outside someone else' stall.

I have no problem discussing bathroom issues only because it is so common. I remember when I was younger and girls would turn on all of the faucets and air dryers to mask the sounds. And, while I don't particularly feel comfortable hearing sounds coming from the stalls (regardless of which number you're doing), it is a natural thing. I also don't have a problem with friends using the bathroom while on the phone. I mean, sometimes, you're in the middle of a conversation that is too good to hold for and it risks peeing your pants. I get that.

But, I think it is odd that I pull a lot of ideas from that first second walking through the bathroom door. At least my novel is not taking place in the bathrooms. Instead, they take place in very specific spots. But the bathroom at work is always a thought-provoker and the bathroom at the bars is always a great segue/escape. I think that the main part is that when you walk into a bathroom, you're finally able to relax for a second. You stop thinking. And that, dear writers, is a blissful time for creation inspiration. ...I wonder if anyone's written a novel from their toilet...I might not want to know.

Cafe-au-Lait

I don't normally drink coffee anymore. Look it up. The Mystery of the Caffeinated Me is quite a fun true story. But now that November is quickly approaching (not fast enough because my creative fingers are dancing over the keyboard in anticipation), I feel that coffee inspiration is like a kick to jumpstart my creativity. Even with a splash of caffeine in my decaf coffee, I'm inspired.

I rearranged my desk this weekend--twice. Originally, it sits in my bedroom, facing the wall under the vast window. I feel boxed in some days. I have to twist and turn to look behind me and see any form of life. Completely turning it around with my back to the window proved to make me feel trapped and constricted nevermind the fact that anyone walking into my room acts as if they are stepping into an office and they ask me for a raise. Next step? Sit beside the window and stare at the closet door. It works. I was able to pound out 5 pages this weekend. It is a very small start but I'll take it!

Now, I must sit on my hands before November. Let's hope the coffee keeps me from scribbling out "ideas" which turn into chapters. Ha!

It's Starting Again...

I can't get him out of my mind...it starts out tinier than a minuscule grain of sand. That muse that just tickles and bubbles. But I can't figure out if I want to run with this one or not. There is so much work that needs to be done this month. Deadlines and projects. Can I put off this inspiration for a whole month? What if I play with these ideas for just a small amount of time...let them swim and wiggle...but what if I completely abandon my two major projects at the moment? What if I drop my deadlines? I can't fail but the excitement is almost starting to take affect. Now, I'm left wondering what I want to do.

Hmm...I think I'm going to play for a little while.
What can I say, I'm addicted to him right now.